Who's Afraid of a Dirty Debutante?
Women's basketball reminds us: Likability still rules for women
Women’s college basketball has been impossible to ignore. Even for me, who was chronically last picked in gym class.
The stats speak. The audience and the money have arrived.
The stands are filled with not just little girls who believe they can, but with male fans paying top dollar and young boys learning women’s sports aren’t just “empowerment,” they’re fun to watch. Even (or maybe especially) because of the way they play. Hard.
And with the name in likeness (NIL) rules in college sports, these players are making real money. And likely, far more money than the WNBA can provide.
Caitlin Clark (IA) estimated earnings:$3.1M
Angel Reese (LSU) estimated earnings: $1.8M
Flau’jae Johnson (LSU) estimated earnings: $1.1M
But with attention comes pushback. Particularly when it comes to women making money and gaining power.
Especially when they are Black.
Enter LSU
Last week an LA Weekly piece called the Iowa/LSU rivalry Good vs Evil and the America’s Sweethearts vs the Dirty Debutantes.
Good: Iowa, a Big Ten Heartland team with a fresh-faced white star, Caitlin Clark.
Evil: A mostly Black team from Louisiana with star Angel Reese and a polarizing white coach.
That coach, Kim Markey called out the racism and misogyny. The writer apologized.
But he was reflecting an internet narrative that started at least a year ago with Reese, Clark and the infamous “you don’t see me” hand wave. Rivalries sell and the media loves to create them, including social media.
It didn’t matter that Clark did it first. It didn’t matter that Clark and Reese are on good terms off-court. The furor burned all year long.
“I got death threats. I was sexualized.”
I've been attacked so many times. Death threats, I've been sexualized, I've been threatened... I'm still human. All this has happened since I won the national championship & I haven't been happy since then." - Angel Reese
AI-created nudes of Reese flooded the internet, and worse. She’s been in tears discussing it, with teammates speaking out about what she’s faced.
It’s not just about race. It’s also about how Reese and others like her continue to be as they are. Not fresh-faced with a basic pony. They have lashes, weaves. And yes, attitude. They are not toning down who they are in how they dress, speak or show up.
It’s not always polished or “nice.” But is it revenge porn and death threat worthy?
Some say her persona and outspokenness mean she can’t express feelings about the attacks she’s gotten. Black commentators have been among the critics and defenders.
“You have to ask why Angel became the villain. You have to ask why her role as ‘villain” has not allowed her to also be human.” - sports journalist Taylor Rooks
Reese, her teammates and her coach refuse to skirt around (pun not intended, but isn’t that turn of phrase interesting when you think about it?) the racism and misogynoir pushed at her and her team:
Reese is working her moment and why shouldn’t she? She revealed her choice to enter the WNBA draft not with a press conference, but a spread in Vogue. Yes, she models. Her teammate Flau’jae Johnson raps.
They refuse to be shrunk.
Same goes for their Coach.
I didn’t know Kim Mulkey’s name until until last week. Her Anti-Fan club was easy to find. Many believe she is homophobic, conservative and an apologist for problematic policies at Baylor, her former employer. Maybe she is.
Yet many of attackers are MAGA-tinged or white male journalists. It seems what they hate is not really her politics, but her outright refusal to act like a lady. She wears sequined sweaters or loud pant suits, “like a streetwalker” say some men on the internet. (still wondering what streets they are walking)
Her family, her facial expressions, all are fodder that’s she’s angry, vindicative and evil. She’s attacked for her looks and her age.
She is an openly aggressive coach who refuses to explain herself, apologize or try to be liked. You know, like most male coaches from the past.
She’s compared to Bobby Knight, who physically assaulted players. Last week, a male coach was hired at Ole Miss. He’s been known to withhold an inhaler from an asthmatic player and pushed 30% of his surveyed players to suicidal ideation.
Yet, NO ONE wants to play for Kim! Ask the popularity contest sponsored by the Athletic, aka the sports section of the NY Times:
All this reminded me of another tough, unpolished and highly competitive white athlete. Anyone else see I, Tonya? Gillespie could be talking about Reese or Mulkey in this interview.
The internet can’t decide if Mulkey is MAGA or woke because LSU was not on the floor for the national anthem.
Neither were three other teams that weekend but: Black Team + Coach Who Calls Out Racism/Misogyny = “Un-American”
Respectability and Likability
These women want to win. They speak their minds, own their greatness and—perhaps most damningly—are OK with others not liking them.
Gasp!
This should not be cause to attack. But so often, it’s a call to arms.
Respectability politics help hold up the glass ceiling. Likability is another pillar. Absolutely and historically for Black women, but on some level, for all women. We are to be humble and self-effacing, caring and “nice.” We are to make work look effortless and be well-spoken, not outspoken.
To get ahead, act like a man. Act “like a man” or just unlike the feminine archetype to get ahead? Get consequences. Get an expectation to “do better” without the support. This double-edged trip wire exists for women in many fields, and it’s enforced by women and men alike.
Regardless of how many “be a badass” self-help books sell or IG posts go up, the culture keeps showing us that likability is king, no matter how powerful the Queen.
More orgasms are an anti-ager. Coming soon: vibrators in Sephora?
Sexual wellness really is a legitimate for women and if it takes fear of aging for women to own that for themselves, so be it.
A crypto company launched a perfume to get women into crypto. Not an April Fool’s Joke. More surprisingly, done by a female CMO.
Why Don’t More Women Become CEOs?
Local story but so many things stopped me here: (1) the need for sponsors (2) the rarity of someone writing a memo to help you (3) older women CEOs saying women want to have more time with their kids when McKinsey and HBR have indicated that women are just as ambitious as men.
Also “become” is rather passive, isn’t it? Not Why Aren’t More Women Appointed CEOs? Just saying.
In case you missed it:
The elf X Liquid Death Corpse Paint Vault collab (the coffin sold it, right?) sold out in 45 minutes.
The Clean Beauty lawsuit vs Sephora was tossed out by a judge mid-March. Did you hear the brands breathing a sigh of relief?
Repro Rights
A TX woman who was charged with murder after her abortion is suing the DA and the county. Interestingly, all key players are Latine.
A breakdown of of the Florida abortion rulings by Jessica Valenti (I subscribe, so should you)
Thorough and eye-openingly awesome, as usual. I'm gonna use the energy I might otherwise put toward shaking my head in disbelief at our species into being a little nicer to someone today. Thanks Julie.
Spot on Julie! Very timely. The likeability thing is crazy. And double standards everywhere you look. I keep thinking about the excellent movie "Origin" (based on book "Caste" which is on my reading list) and its implications on gender. I'm simplifying here but she describes how human societies are based on caste systems. In American this interacts with race too (but in other places it's independent of race/ethnicity). It seems that we are being kept in our place by being made, or feeling compelled, to compete for scraps and struggle for social position and status.